'Excruciatingly, soul-crushingly boring' (Jeff J Mitchell/Getty Images)

While the rest of the country shivers, takes an anxious glance at their online bank account and gloomily turns the thermostat even further down, one man has good reason to celebrate as we stagger towards the end of the year. The very first opinion poll of 2022 showed Keir Starmer’s Labour Party just 3% ahead of Boris Johnson’s Conservatives, a desperately fragile margin midway through the parliamentary cycle.
Yet in the past 12 months everything has changed. The Conservatives are now onto their third Prime Minister of the year, having done their best to torpedo their own reputation for economic responsibility, while the Bank of England predicts the longest recession since records began. Above all, Starmer’s poll lead now stands somewhere around 20%, depending on whom you ask. The sense of inevitability is such that even the Chester by-election, which Labour won with a swing of almost 14%, was treated by the press as a bit of a non-event. Maybe the Conservatives will come back in time for the general election; after all, they’ve done it before. They’ve never done it, though, against such a gloomy economic backdrop.
So, while Starmer would be rash to give Pickfords a ring just yet, he wouldn’t be human if he didn’t look up their number, just in case. If Starmer does make it into Downing Street, he’ll be only the seventh Labour Prime Minister in our history, following Ramsay MacDonald, Clement Attlee, Harold Wilson, Jim Callaghan, Tony Blair and Gordon Brown. (The Tories have had twice that number since 1924.) No doubt readers will have strong views about some of the names on that list. (All men, of course: a fact that really irritates Labour partisans when you bring it up.)
The really remarkable thing, though, is that there have been so few of them. Indeed, only three of those men — Attlee, Wilson and Blair — actually won a Labour majority at a General Election, an astonishing statistic when you consider that their party styles itself as the People’s Party. I would guess that most of us instinctively think of the Tories and Labour as rivals of roughly equal standing, a bit like the Republicans and the Democrats across the Atlantic. But if winning elections is the test, which it surely is, then the two parties are less Liverpool and Manchester City than Liverpool and West Bromwich Albion.
As it happens, it’s exactly 99 years today since the election that gave us the very first Labour government — although in a sign of things to come, they didn’t come close to winning a majority. The circumstances were complicated, to say the least. A year earlier, in the autumn of 1922, the collapse of the Lloyd George coalition had triggered a general election. The Conservatives won handsomely under the dour Canadian-born businessman Bonar Law, with the Liberals divided and Labour a very poor second. But Bonar Law fell ill with terminal cancer the following spring, and was succeeded by his Chancellor, the former Harrow pornographer turned media countryman Stanley Baldwin.
Amid a series of enormously complicated intrigues, Baldwin adopted a new policy of economic protectionism, for which, he decided, he must have a new mandate from the voters. So, on 6 December 1923, the voters turned out for their second general election in barely a year. Almost everybody expected Baldwin to romp home, rather as people expected Theresa May to crush the saboteurs in 2017. Alas, we know what happened to her — and it happened to Baldwin, too. His majority vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving a hung parliament in which the Tories had 258 seats, Labour 191 and the Liberals 158. To almost universal disbelief — including, it has to be said, his own — Ramsay MacDonald made his way to Buckingham Palace for a historic audience with George V.
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